Life Changers

For the 2 people who haven't been paying attention, some rather fortuitous and humbling events happened in my life recently:

1. I was elected to receive the 33rd Degree in Freemasonry.
2. I was promoted at work to "Application Support Team Leader", which basically means I'm over support of all systems, and the upgrade of existing systems.

That is all.

Bling Goggles and The Pedestal of Rank

In Freemasonry, we have a term for when someone is overly fawning and impressed with someone of higher "rank": Bling Goggles.  Rather than act like a regular person, some people adopt a fawning, sycophantic attitude towards they perceive as their "betters".  More often than not, their "betters" are more aptly described as those with more years of experience, and sometimes more wisdom.

In Aikido, the situation is far worse.  The pair of Bling Goggles is transformed into a veritable Pedestal of Rank.  While it is certainly not universal, the high ranking Aikidoka are sparsely populated with everything from the merely depressed to full on drunkards, or even alleged statutory rapists.

The beginning Aikido student really isn't to blame.  They are thrust into the heady world where advanced teachers can do seemingly magical things.  They are instantly expected to show respect and deference to teachers and more advanced students.  That isn't the cause of the Pedestal.  The true cause is the advanced student or yudansha (black belt) who believes, or at least doesn't instantly dispel misdirected comments or actions of the uninformed.  For instance, in an overheard conversation:

"Sensei, you're as important as Jesus!"
"Hmmmm.....  Yes." (in a knowing tone).

While an extreme example, it shows that if one starts to reject humility as being a vital component to rank, it's pretty easy to get hoisted up onto that pedestal.  You may enjoy the view for a while, but it's never a stable position.  Just like when Bling Goggles crack or fall off, falling off the Pedestal of Rank can be especially bruising if one has bought into their own mythology.  Ultimately, we're all just people, regardless of whether we have direct lineage to O' Sensei (or O' Sensei himself), or we're a 33rd Degree Mason.  It's appropriate to respect people for their accomplishments, but not to fawn over them because of a title.  It's even more appropriate, even vital, for those who have accomplished a rank (be it Aikidoka or Mason), to act with humility, and to not reward the uninformed and misdirected efforts of those with less experience to place them on the Pedestal.

Some Theories on Civility, and the Downfall Thereof

So America's President ordered the killing of one of the most heinous and evil men in history, Osama bin Laden. This order was carried out by the military, of which he is Commander in Chief, and suddenly, it's too much to give the President even one iota of credit.  Two years into his presidency, and some are claiming, rather fantastically, that he's "riding on Bush's coat-tails."

Now balance that with the opinion that, given the same amount of time, he should have fixed the American economy.

So which is it?

Everywhere, civility is disappearing, society is polarizing.  Democrats and Republicans.  Liberals and Conservatives.  There's hardly any decorum to be found, especially on the internet.  Why?  Anonymity and the ability to hide behind a monitor, hurling virtual insults across the world makes everyone brave.  We don't have to ultimately stand behind our statements.  We can delete a post, remove a profile, change the privacy settings.

And for what it's worth, if Bush had done the same thing, I'd like to think I'd say: "Good for him!  Though I disagree with a lot of what he does, he still helped end the reign of an evil man."  As for why we can't say that about President Obama, I think it comes down to one fact that makes many Americans uncomfortable.

A New Year, a Climb Out, and Other Miscellany

Happy New Year to you all.  All two of my loyal readers.

I've been re-reading "The Spiritual Foundations of Aikido" to help me get out of this funk I'm in.  And training.  Aikido training has reached a point for me that there's not a whole bunch that's new, just variations on basics.  Added to a dismaying failure of a good friend to pass a test of his, I've gone into a "phase" where I'm wondering if Aikido training is still useful or necessary.

Why do I train?  Self defense?  The few times I've actually used Aikido had more to do with goofing around, and once to teach someone not to grab my kilted butt.  Fitness?  I hate going to the gym, and am generally sedentary otherwise.  However, Aikido training provides variety beyond running on a treadmill, or lifting something heavy (Though I have to express a dislike for exercises I can't see the point of, such as Koho Tento Undo, or as I call it "Getting up and down a lot.")  Fitness / Exercise isn't why I train however.

After casting about for a while, I've learned the two things that will keep me training: 1) The spiritual aspects of Aikido, and 2) Friendships.

Why the spiritual aspects?  Because they mimic so much of what I see in another of my life's important areas: Freemasonry.  O-Sensei proclaimed:

"There is only one thing that is wrong or useless: That is the stubborn insistence that you are an individual, separate from others."

 My Masonic Brothers who are clever and / or members of the Scottish Rite will see some resonance here.  I don't think the above quote has anything to do with good or evil beyond pointing out a path for someone to behave in a good or evil way.  If one could see this connection with everyone else, how would one's actions be different?  Except for the psychopath, or extreme group-think situations (war atrocities), nearly everyone would pause before some negative action.

So we'll see what things are like after a period of training, just for the sake of training.  My bet is things will be better.

The Simplest Way

First, a statement that will seem out of place: I should have added one word: "Allegedly".

Secondly, this blog has gotten me some grief, especially when I use it to point out bad behavior.  My way of doing so is brash and not the most "sensitive" of ways.  It also gets me some telephone calls and demanding emails.  Apparently more people are watching what I say than I think, especially on Facebook.

I do have to wonder if I'd said things in a nicer way, using words like "allegedly" and other vagaries, would the response have been so negative?  I think it probably would only have been slightly less negative, simply because people don't like their bad behaviors pointed out.  I know I don't.

The big lesson I've learned from these interactions is this: "leaders" put on their pants the same way I do.  They experience the same human failings, and show the same range of behaviors and emotions.  Sometimes, the situations that actually require that I respect them are limited to formal interactions.  For instance, one can find some great Aikido teachers and masters out there that also happen to be drunks, chauvinists, bigots, and generally difficult people.  I respect their Aikido abilities, but cannot respect them as people.  I bow and show respect at the dojo, but not in public.

In Freemasonry, a friend of mine and I like to call the act of putting someone on a pedestal "Bling Goggles".  Often they're worn by those who are fairly new, and who are still dazzled by the myriad of titles.  They most often learn differently however.  The real danger however, are those who buy into and cultivate this admiration.  They turn into the "emperor with no clothes".

So whether it be Aikido, Freemasonry, or anything else, fancy titles are to be used in formal settings only.  In public, I advise you to use the phrase: "That and $1.50 will get you a cup of coffee at Denny's"

Back to the Essence of Things

There's been some pressure to try to test for my Sandan (3rd degree black belt) in December.  Let's just say, that's not going to happen.  I don't really want to live at the dojo just so I can get ready.  Further, since we've switched associations in the last year, I'd be required to display the AAA variants of everything I know at a Sandan level.  Some are there, others are not.

As an aside, I dislike a certain aspect of AAA weapons.  If you're going to hit someone with a jo, then for god's sake, hit them.  Get rid of this mamby-pamby stopping above or before your target.  If the person doesn't get out of the way, they'll learn the lesson pretty quickly.  Just my own two cents worth, but it takes away some of the martial aspect of weapons.  After all, someone hitting you with a bat isn't going to pull their swing.  They're going to try to hit a home run.

So when will I test?  The best answer I've come up with is "sometime next year".  I'm not going to let it worry me.  I have had to get back to why I practice Aikido in the first place.  I do it because I enjoy it, and I think the philosophy helps me to be a better person.  Rank is nice, but cannot be the focus of anyone's training once they've reached the dan rankings.  With increasing time between ranks, anyone who expects anything but waiting (and training) with patience will be bitterly disappointed.

WCF (Windows Communication Foundation) Tip.

WHATEVER you do, when you apply the DataContract() attribute to an object, ALWAYS give it a Public default constructor.  Otherwise, you'll get useless error messages such as: 

"System.TimeoutException: This request operation sent to '' did not receive a reply within the configured timeout (00:00:14:7815986).  The time allotted to this operation may have been a portion of a longer timeout."

When I see that error, and the solution above, I always think "Oh, of course." (Note sarcasm).

Anger First Aid Kit

1. Smile
2. Speak Softly
3. Relax
4. Disengage
5. Empathy

Most Important

My wife and I are going to give counseling a good college try, and hope to make this marriage work.  While we're not out of the woods, at least we found a path.